my book recommendations

relationships

Books about attachment, communication, intimacy, and building relationships rooted in safety, honesty, and repair.

Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Non-Monogamy
Jessica Fern

Mating in Captivity
Esther Perel

Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love
Sue Johnson

Nonviolent Communication
Marshall B. Rosenberg

You Are The One You’ve Been Waiting For
Richard Schwartz

pleasure, sex and sexuality

Books about pleasure, desire, embodiment, and honest conversations about sex, intimacy, and how we love.

Come as You Are: The Surprising New Science that Will Transform Your Sex Life
Emily Nagoski 

Come Together: The Science (and Art!) of Creating Lasting Sexual Connections
Emily Nagoski 

Greedy: Notes from a Bisexual Who Wants Too Much
Jen Winston

The New Bottoming Book
Dossie Easton and Janet Hardy

The New Topping Book
Dossie Easton and Janet Hardy

The Ethical Slut
Dossie Easton and Janet Hardy

Sex Talks: The Five Conversations That Will Transform Your Love Life
Vanessa Marin & Xander Marin

So Tell Me About the Last Time You Had Sex: Laying Bare and Learning to Repair Our Love Lives
Ian Kerner

The Book of Delights
Ross Gay

The Body is Not an Apology: The Power of Radical Self-Love
Sonya Renee Taylor

Desire: An Inclusive Guide to Navigating Libido Differences in Relationships
Lauren Fogel Mercy & Jennifer A. Vencill

emotional health and healing

Books on stress, trauma, self-compassion, and learning to live more gently in a demanding world.

No Bad Parts
Richard Schwartz

My Grandmother’s Hands: Racialized Trauma and the Pathway to Mending Our Hearts and Bodies
Resmaa Menakem

Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself
Kristen Neff

Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle
Emily Nagoski & Amelia Nagoski

Four Thousand Weeks
Oliver Burkeman